Politics
Sussan to a T
Of all the pressing issues facing Australia – cost of living, housing, global instability – the one that has truly captured the nation’s attention is… a t-shirt. Yes, that t-shirt. The Joy Division number Prime […]
Articles by Roswell
Politics
An ode to Barnaby
Once upon a time, Barnaby Joyce was the Deputy Prime Minister of Australia. Yes, the actual Deputy PM. The same bloke who now looks like he’s been dragged through a pub trivia night backwards. Let’s […]
Health
If there’s a bandwagon to jump on, the Liberals have their tickets ready
If there’s one thing the Liberal Party can be relied upon, it’s enthusiasm for a good bandwagon. The moment an issue, controversy or passing outrage starts picking up speed, Sussan Ley and company are already […]
Politics
Trump’s Time-Travel Election Rigging Blunder: A Cosmic Comedy of Errors
Dear readers, hold onto your hats – or at least your history books – because President Trump has just launched a late-night Truth Social tirade that’s less “stable genius” and more “Back to the Future” […]
AIM Extra
My Psychic Bingo Card of the Unthinkable
I’ve always fancied myself a bit of a psychic rockstar, my intuition sharp enough to cut through the noise of the universe. But lately? My crystal ball’s gone foggy, and my prized bingo card – […]
Politics
From tan suits to total demolition: the evolving standards of outrage at Fox News
Back in 2014, America faced what Fox News declared the most shocking scandal of the Obama era: the President wore a tan suit. For days, the network’s airwaves trembled under the weight of moral indignation. […]
Politics
The Rudd reckoning that wasn’t
Donald Trump, fresh off a golf club victory lap, turned a press conference into a WWE smackdown segment. The target? Kevin Rudd – Australia’s silver-tongued ex-PM turned ambassador – who was called out for his […]
Satire
Barnaby’s job application
Job Application: Parliamentary Position Position Sought: Senior Political Strategist, Lead Candidate, or Deputy Leader (I’m flexible, but I’d look cracking with a title) Applicant: The Right Honourable Barnaby Joyce, Former Deputy Prime Minister, Professional Headline […]
Satire
Ley not concerned by MPs defecting to Nationals: “At least someone will want them”
Liberal leader shrugs off reports of defections, calls it “just the Coalition’s natural circulation system.” Opposition Leader Sussan Ley is treating reports that a gaggle of Liberal MPs could defect to the Nationals over climate […]
Satire
The Liberal Party needs Abbott – and the whole circus back
An opinion piece this week suggested that Tony Abbott is just what the Liberal Party needs right now. Apparently, someone missed the memo from ten years ago – the one that said, “Thanks, Tony, but […]
Satire
Trump: should he be let back in?
Note: This article is satire (or wishful thinking). BREAKING: President Trump Denied Re-Entry Into U.S. Under Precedent Set By His Own Administration In a stunning application of long-standing policy, President Donald Trump was detained and […]
Satire
The Liberal Party’s Great Leap Forward (to 1996)
In a bold bid to drag the Liberal Party kicking and screaming into the modern era, Sussan Ley announced plans to hoist the party all the way from the 1950s to the 1990s – “a […]
Politics
The Efficiency of Chaos
If there’s one thing Donald Trump has always excelled at, it’s smashing things to bits and slapping an “efficiency” sticker on the wreckage. The latest masterpiece? Mass-sacking of over 4,000 federal workers – with a […]
Politics
If you only have time for one jaw-drop today…
Brace yourself. What follows is less a press conference than a work of fiction – complete with imaginary achievements, loyal supporting characters, and a plot twist that reality never saw coming. Trump’s latest appearance, packed […]
Satire
Pauline Hanson’s plan to bring it all back
Pauline Hanson has had enough – again. This time it’s not immigration, political correctness, or the United Nations plotting to steal your barbecue. No, the latest threat to Australian civilisation is the 25-cent recycled paper […]