John Clarke was born in Palmerston North, New Zealand, in 1948 and after a brief love affair with the Massey-Ferguson tractor, and a marathon runaway success in God Zone Country, playing Fred Dagg the archetypal, laconic dead-pan to camera Kiwi rural everyman, he became one of the great satirists of the English-speaking world. John Clarke and Bryan Dawe performed their weekly interview sketches on ABC Television from 1989 until Clarke’s sudden death on 9 April 2017, aged 68, while hiking in the Grampians in Victoria.
John died doing what he loved, in country that suited him, not far from where he had made his home. The sketches he left behind remain the gold standard of political satire in this country: patient, precise, and merciless.
This piece is offered in that spirit, and in his memory.
* * * * *
Dawe: Mr Chalmers, thanks for your time.
Clarke: Bryan, it’s always a pleasure. Genuinely.
Dawe: Before the last election, did the Labor Party promise not to change negative gearing?
Clarke: We said what we said in the circumstances that existed at that time.
Dawe: Which was yes?
Clarke: Which was what it was. Circumstances change, Bryan. The world moves very fast these days.
Dawe: Right. So you’ve changed negative gearing.
Clarke: We’ve reformed the settings around established residential investment properties in a way that protects housing supply while addressing the structural inequities that have locked a generation of Australians out of the great Australian dream.
Dawe: So you’ve changed negative gearing.
Clarke: We’ve taken a sensible, targeted, responsible, and frankly long-overdue step in the right direction.
Dawe: Who does the change apply to?
Clarke: Investors in established residential properties acquired after 7:30 in the evening of the 12th of May.
Dawe: This year?
Clarke: This year.
Dawe: 7:30 in the evening.
Clarke: AEST.
Dawe: So if you bought at 7:29, you’re fine.
Clarke: The grandfathering provisions are designed to protect investors who made decisions in good faith under the existing legislative framework.
Dawe: At 7:29.
Clarke: Or earlier. We’re not unreasonable people.
Dawe: And new builds?
Clarke: Exempt.
Dawe: Superannuation funds?
Clarke: Exempt.
Dawe: Widely held trusts?
Clarke: Exempt.
Dawe: Build-to-rent developments?
Clarke: Exempt.
Dawe: Private investors supporting government housing programs?
Clarke: Also exempt, yes.
Dawe: So who does it actually apply to?
Clarke: Australians who purchased an established residential investment property after 7:30 in the evening of the 12th of May and who are not a superannuation fund, widely held trust, build-to-rent developer, government housing partner, or the owner of a property that was under contract prior to that time.
Dawe: And they’ll start paying more tax when?
Clarke: The 1st of July 2027.
Dawe: Next year.
Clarke: These things require careful implementation.
Dawe: And the capital gains tax discount?
Clarke: Replaced with cost base indexation for inflation and a 30 per cent minimum tax on net capital gains for assets held more than twelve months.
Dawe: You promised not to do that either.
Clarke: We changed our position. Like we changed stage three. Like we changed fuel excise. We looked the Australian people in the eye and we said, we could take the easy political path here, or we could take the path that’s right for the country.
Dawe: And you chose the right path.
Clarke: Starting in July 2027, yes.
Dawe: Mr Chalmers. In summary, you’ve broken a promise, created a system that doesn’t take effect for fourteen months, that applies to a category of investor specifically defined by not being any of the categories you’ve exempted, and you’d like credit for this.
Clarke: We’d like credit for the courage it took to have the conversation, yes.
Dawe: Thanks for your time.
Clarke: The great Australian dream, Bryan. We’re fighting for it every day.
* * * * *
Jim Chalmers is the Treasurer of Australia. He cannot remember what he said before the election, but he said it in good faith at the time, and the circumstances have since changed.
The Clarke and Dawe format and original works are the copyright of Roderick Willows Pty Ltd (the Clarke estate) and Bryan Dawe. This piece is written by David Tyler (Urban Wronski) as an act of homage, not reproduction. No commercial use intended.
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Things fall apart. The centre cannot hold (let alone the fringes). Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world (and the Murdoch maggoty media munchers). Yeats has already spoken, of irritable idiots, dudded punters, unhappy former beneficiaries of advantage, because truth is eternal…so no change is ever likely if cunning lucky “winners” oppose all decency, revision, correction, fairness, Send them to NSW!! (Er..)