Clarke & Dawe – “The Transactional States of America”

Political illustration with text and cityscape background.

Dawe: Mr President, are the United States at war with Venezuela?

Clarke: No.

Dawe: So there has been no invasion?

Clarke: No. We’ve simply taken control.

Dawe: By force.

Clarke: Efficiently.
(Pause)

Dawe: Under what authority have you taken control of a sovereign nation?

Clarke: American authority.

Dawe: Derived from?

Clarke: Capability.
(Pause)

Dawe: Isn’t that a breach of international law?

Clarke: International law is more of a guideline.

Dawe: For whom?

Clarke:
For countries without leverage.
(Pause)

Dawe: The President of Venezuela has been captured.

Clarke: Yes.

Dawe: On what charges?

Clarke: Violating American law.

Dawe:
In Venezuela.

Clarke: Correct.

Dawe:
Does American law apply in Venezuela?

Clarke: It does now.
(Pause)

Dawe: Could Venezuela arrest you under Venezuelan law?

Clarke: That would be illegal.

Dawe: Why?

Clarke: Because they lack jurisdiction.

Dawe: And who defines jurisdiction?

Clarke: The strongest party in the room.
(Pause)

Dawe: Mr President, critics say this is about oil.

Clarke: That’s ridiculous.

Dawe: So oil has nothing to do with it?

Clarke: No.

Dawe: Yet you said, and I quote, “It’s going to make a lot of money.”

Clarke: Yes.

Dawe: For whom?

Clarke: For America.

Dawe: Which Americans?

Clarke: The successful ones.
(Pause)

Dawe: Are there American troops on the ground?

Clarke: We prefer not to say “boots on the ground”.

Dawe: Are there boots?

Clarke: Yes.

Dawe: On the ground?

Clarke: Very profitably placed.
(Pause)

Dawe: How long will the United States run Venezuela?

Clarke: Until it’s stable.

Dawe: Defined how?

Clarke: When it stops costing us money and starts making it.
(Pause)

Dawe: Mr President, we’re told today’s meeting included an agenda item on rebranding the United States.

Clarke: Yes.

Dawe: Why is that necessary?

Clarke: The current name implies obligations.

Dawe: Such as?

Clarke: Democracy. Law. Alliances.
(Pause)

Dawe: What names are under consideration?

Clarke: United States, Inc.

Dawe: America Holdings LLC.

Clarke: US Global Assets & Enforcement.

Dawe: TrumpCo.

Clarke: Formerly a constitutional republic.
(Pause)

Dawe: And The Transactional States of America?

Clarke: We like that. It’s honest.
(Pause)

Dawe: Does this mean allies are now customers?

Clarke: Or liabilities.

Dawe: And international norms?

Clarke: Non-binding.

Dawe: Human rights?

Clarke: Case-by-case.
(Pause)

Dawe: Mr President, critics say this sets a dangerous precedent.

Clarke: Only if others copy it.

Dawe:
And if they do?

Clarke: We’ll call it aggression.
(Long pause)

Dawe: So to be clear: this is not war, not occupation, not theft, and not imperialism.

Clarke: Correct.

Dawe: What is it?

Clarke:
A restructuring.
(Final pause)

Dawe:
Thank you, Mr President.

Clarke: Thank you. We’re very good at deals.

Dawe: Yes. History will invoice accordingly.
(End)


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About Lachlan McKenzie 163 Articles
I believe in championing Equity & Inclusion. With over three decades of experience in healthcare, I’ve witnessed the power of compassion and innovation to transform lives. Now, I’m channeling that same drive to foster a more inclusive Australia - and world - where every voice is heard, every barrier dismantled, and every community thrives. Let’s build fairness, one story at a time.

2 Comments

  1. Now that Trump has set the tone and the Albanese government has passed legislation rigging the coming election in its favour, what is the chance some country will conduct an efficient temporary taking of control and arrest and remove Albanese for us?

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